my list

The list I made during my first week at law school:

Things I want to do During My Five Years In Law School


Be a 10 pointer
Win an international level mooting competition
Get my article published in Harvard Law Journal
Intern at Amarchand Mangaldas
Write a book about life at law school and get it published
Fall in love J


The list I made after one semester:

Things I want to do in THIS Law school if I don’t clear CLAT and am stuck here:
Be a rebel. Revolt against the administration. Stick my tongue out at the director
Since the college won’t send me to moot in all likelihood, protest against the shocking arbitrariness and be VERY abusive.
Form my own debating committee.
Kick any guy who tries to mess with me in the nuts.
Become a raving alcoholic.
Not have any arrears. Who cares about being a ten-pointer?
Fall in Love? No way. What was I thinking?
Write a book about life at hell—oops I mean, law school and get it published. If this happens, I’ll mention names and the first page will say… “All the characters in the book are fictional and if you happen to find your name in it, it’s purely coincidental.”

more nonsense.

I don't know what is becoming of this tiny world we live in called 'country', and frankly, I am starting to care less. Maybe it's because some of us are giving up hope on the system that fails to cater to what is ought to cater, and which allows a million flaws to permeate through. I might sound cynical, but well, we're all powerless souls caught in the labyrinth of tyranny inflicted upon the state by people who possess power, misappropriately used. The misery created by Raj Thackeray is unpardonable, but ultimately, it is only power that counts, which is why he was allowed to go scot-free. Justice is never served.
As a law student, its awfully difficult to digest injustice that happens everywhere, every milli-second. And it's even more difficult since I study in a place where power holds over merit, and everytime you try to be different from the heap, there are vicious hands vying for your blood, clawing and frantically trying to pull you down and drag you to their incomprehensible level of inhumane barbarianism. You're asphyxiated by the manacles of a system that only succeeds in extinguishing the spark of enthusiasm that rests within you and saps you off energy, leaving you feeling crestfallen and hollow.

We live in an epoch where people in college are smitten by the Hindi-movie romances they see onscreen. Boy meets girl, they fall in 'love' within a span of few months, pour their hearts out to each other, and blah-blah-blah. Where have my fellow law students thrown their common sense?

And among all the other things that dont make sense, there is mooting. Mooting is the biggest fad in law school. It's considered fancy even. The hours of hardwork that go into preparing a memorial on a subject you have hardly any idea about, however, crumbles when you stand before the bench, and the useless judge (who is probably in an extremely bad mood that day) decides to vent his anger on you and grill you on some irrelevant tiny detail that needs a magnifying glass to be looked at. When your hardwork is reduced to dust, there are a million fingers pointing at you, not appreciating the fact that you've worked hard and done well, but actually trying to stamp out the tiny spark within you that yearns to be rekindled. Enthusiasm.

The system in most law schools (including the place I study in) sucks. There's no better substitute for the word. Apart from being infused with shocking arbitrariness, these so-called rules formulated by a bunch of hoity-toity seniors who think the world of themselves are often amended to suit their convenience. Any form of assertiveness exerted by some of us who possess more common sense than the rest is misconstrued as rebellion. So be it. The system that is full of loopholes demands rebellion, and if we all have to pelt the posh, glass windows of the administrative block with rotten tomatoes, so be it. However, this never happens.
You see, when you move forward to represent a chunk of people who are not bold enough to stand up for themselves, you automatically assume that you will be backed by your peers. But when you're too deep in the hole you've dug, you realize that you're alone. Those people you represent fail to watch you back.
Not even a semester is over, and already, law school seems to have sapped the energy out of me. Everytime you want to do something, there are ten people you go against. The politics within the college is disgusting, yet, so hard to keep out of. Once you're in it, there's no way to avoid the loathsome glares and the whisperings.
For those of you misconstrue my enthusiasm as being an opportunistic know-it-all, I couldn't care less. We're law students, living in a country that believes in democracy, and we shall ensure that justice prevails. Even if we have to revolt against the unreasonable, floating system established by the seniors, we will do so.

???

The Indian judicial system has gone to the dogs. The very poorly handled Aarushi murder case just goes all out to reinforce the fact that the police and investigating team in our country are useless and that the judicial system is disintegrating. The Indian police catch a tiger, beat it, flog it and nearly force it to admit that its not a tiger, but a cat. And the bloodthirsty media is waiting hungrily to devour every teeny bit of information they get (they're least bothered whether the information is a fact or a fib), so that they can blow it out of proportion and have it on every news channel, every newspaper. And the criminal lawyer who is defending the poor accused who is very evidently, innocent? He gives an impression that he has just about scraped through some third-rate law school and is trying his best to prove himself as a fairly good criminal lawyer so that he can earn his daily bread, but in vain. He's dumb. There's no better way to put it. He's incapable of answering questions and raising objections, incapable of doing what he is supposed to do, what he is paid to do. Ensure justice. I'm not surprised.
With all the lawyers in our country vying to earn big bucks in corporate firms, the sole purpose of law (which is, to ensure that there is justice) is lost. Every law school graduate is content with the mere thought of sitting at some corporate firm, as long as they're able to buy that snazzy BMW and all the latest gadgets. And justice? Who cares that the whole country is falling apart! We've spent every single day and night in law school freezing our asses over inordinately fat law books and absurdly tough assignments, and it was the prospect of earning the big buck that kept us going. Why should we defend some pathetic soul who has been wrongly accused of crime--a court case that is likely to drag on for years (knowing our wonderful judicial system), and we'd hardly eat three square-meals a day with the money we make for that. We didn't spend a fortune on law-school to spend the rest of our lives in penury!
And so, its only those 'incorrigibly dumb' people who don't snag a job at those million-bucks-paying corporate firms who despondently decide to opt for criminal law (out of no other choice). And whilst three fourth of these 'lawyers' defend the criminals (for money, of course. We'd do anything for money, wouldnt we?), the remaining one-fourth who choose to defend the innocent blink dumbly at everyone and choose to keep their mouths shut.
The lack of good lawyers in our country, in addition to the glorious judicial system that continues to prevail (and shall do so, for a long long time), all contributes to the backwardness of our country.
Dr. Rajesh Talwar, besides losing his only daughter (that was concieved five years after marriage, with the aid of some high-tech equipment, as his wife underwent some complications), also lost his job, his reputation, and everything that constituted his life. And the extremely inefficient, lazy police not only framed Dr. Talwar (with what they considered to be 'evidence', which was nothing but a couple of unanswered questions), but they also took pleasure in maligning the reputation of his family. The media just added fuel to the fire, but implying that Dr. Talwar was in an extra-marital relationship, and killed his daughter when he found her sleeping with the servant.
The lawyer, Mr. Pinaki Mishra, was incapable of defending his client. Al their appeals for bails failed, as Dr. Talwar was retained in police custody. The UP police were thrilled. The case was closed. Dr. Talwar murdered his child. They were least bothered whether he was guilty or not. They wanted to close the case. That's all.
The question is, isn't it always innocent until proven guilty? In this case, Dr. Talwar was evidently not proven guilty. He wasn't proven innocent either, but there was no strong enough evidence to imply that he had killed his daughter. Then, how on earth could his lawyer allow him to stay in jail?
Once the CBI took over the case, they were convinced that Dr. Talwar was innocent, but they couldn't let him get off immediately. They would only jeopardize the reputation of the UP police. So, they retained him again and continued their investigation.
No one was able to solve the case. It was a confession from the actual killer during the narco test that finally brought light. Until then, Dr. Rajesh Talwar was considered the murderer.
The next question is, if the real murderer had not owned up, then would Rajesh Talwar have been released from custody? I doubt. He was first of all wrongly framed, with absolutely no evidence, and after sensationalizing the incident so much, it was essential to close the case once and for all. The question of justice never arose. It all came down to completing the business.
That's what it all boils down to, ultimately.
Money. And doing the job. Not doing it correctly, but just doing it.
And whilst all the lawyers continue to march with the baton towards those corporate law firms that guarantees them the materialistic delights of life, we can watch our country collapsing. In glee.

Musings....

This is going to come out sounding very bitter and sardonic and if I do offend any patriotic 'I worship the soil we walk on types', I'm least bothered. While we've so far been looking at the world from behind rose-tinted glasses, it's time that (some of us) take them off and actually look. A few years back, Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam wrote a book titled Vision 2020 and said that by 2020 India will become one of the super-powers, and will even surpass US. Nearly a decade has passed since he said that, and our quest towards achieving that status has progressed very marginally, if it has progressed at all. While we believe we're living in a place that has offered us all that it could in its capacity, little do we realize that this 'capacity' has not yet been defined. And it probably never will.
Going back in time, there was the biggest debacle that nearly shook the flimsy foundation that this world is constructed upon. The world wars. It was the impact of the second World War (following the Treaty of Versailles signed by a defeated Germany) that dropped the biggest bomb. Back then, India was still under the mercy of the British, fighting for freedom, fighting for peace, with Gandhiji advocating non-violence and ahimsa, which is evident from the very fact that he touted tolerance in an open letter addressed to Adolf Hitler. Several other Indian leaders and politicians expressed concern over the rise of Fascism and Nazism and supported the British cause, as opposed to taking the neutral stance that they had always chosen, until then.
Either way, India was unscathed by the impact of the World War, which left the entire globe restless and panic-stricken. The fight for freedom continued, using the tools of peace and non-violence. And then, freedom was granted. Gandhiji and the other preachers of peace and non-violence were assassinated. The turmoil began. When the British evacuated India after stripping it of its wealth, penury prevailed. Post Gandhian era, India even broke its ethical code of non-violence (surprise!) by entering into war with Pakistan.
The newly constituted British-free government strived to elevate the downtrodden by implementing poverty-alleviation programs, employment schemes, and even including reservations for the backward classes in most education institutions.
The plight improved. But marginally.
Because, despite the initiatives taken to bring about the change, the very desire to be a part of a new and better environment does not exist. People dont want to study or work. Education is a burden. They'd much rather live. Just exist and then leave the earth. Then there are the class of people who want to enjoy opulence without working for it. They find illicit ways of making fast and good money, and they are the quittessential elements of corruption, dishonesty. And then, there are the middle-class people, who pinch pennies, acquire a respectable degree and earn a respectable salary at a 9-5 job. They're happy. They're able to afford meals and a roof over their head. It ends there.
The desire to bring about a change is lost under a flurry of selfishness, avarice and yes, even fear. Fear that if they speak out, they will be condemned to a life of fear, a life similiar to the famous writer, Taslima Nasreen, who even now fears to touch the Pakistan soil lest they chop off her head.
So the quest to continues, but in vain. Those who give up hope, gladly leave the country to serve a foreign land, whilst we continue to grapple with the basic task of shoving food down our throats.
Japan, is a classic example of a country that has strived to progress over the years. After combatting poverty and unemployment, they have started to see the better side of the world, whilst the Indian hyprocrites continue to brag about how their "rich culture and heritage" (ahem--We're somewhere at the top in AIDS, and we have politicians who follow bigamy and sometimes, god forbid, even polyogamy) compensates for the lack of overall development.
I hope I am not brutally slain for this post. Peace, all.

A Tribute to my school........

I went to school today to collect my marksheets. As I walked across the stretch of sand that led to the school building, I was twinged with pangs of nostalgia. I thought about those days when I sported the prefect-badge and strutted around the school exuding an air of confidence and authority. The memories came crashing down on me, as I smiled at the familiar faces that now had a distant, faraway look in their eyes. I further made my way down the long corridor, which was mottled with a certain familiar faces that all stared at me. Some whispered. Some smiled. I had a customory smile plastered on my face, as I walked down the endless corridor that was so silent that I could hear my own breathing. That corridor had always been my favorite. It invokes pleasant memories of the eleventh grade, when our class was labelled the 'Noisiest class'. That corridor reminds me of slipping out of classes, sneaking in when no one was looking, meaningful conversations with special people who have made a difference in my life, bunking classes and having no place to go, being a dutiful prefect during school assemblies, conversations with teachers, some whom I liked, and some I didn't get along with, sharing Pepsi from the canteen, sucking on smuggled-in Fun oranges, turning my nose up at the gang of sweaty guys who crowd around the water-cooler after playing football in the field. I yearn to enter the eleventh-grade classroom, but it is locked. The eleventh grade classroom is my favorite. I sat in the front bench, right next to the window, where I would look out and stare at the field during exceptionally boring Economics classes. Sitting in the corner had its own advantages. I often sent smses during classes (I attended very few classes back then), and would whisper to the person sitting next to me and the people behind me. We never did our work. Fat accounts textbooks were untouched and were used as pillows to rest our heads on. Free periods ensured that the class was always empty. The classroom was perennially filled with excited screaming students hooting away and kicking the football around, throwing chalk, and well, there were even ink-fights and water-fights. Classes were never taken seriously. Half the time, we'd bunk classes, and the very few classes that we DID attend were spent sending smses under the desk, listening to music in the last row and scrawling our names on the much-abused benches in fancy calligraphy. Eleventh-grade was fun. We were all a bunch of people who didn't look too far into the future, who lived for the moment, and who had no idea what it would be like stepping out. It was something very few of us even considered. We went about chasing butterflies and building sand castles in the air. At that time, nothing mattered.

The eleventh-grade annual exams, however, were a shock to all of us, and the aftermath of it was even worse. Following the final exams, we lost a person who was the quittissential element of our class, a loved one. Suddenly, not everything seemed all that rosy as it did. Gone was the laughter and the hooting. We were too shocked to even shed tears. That incident taught us the value of life, and that it takes just seconds for a card house to come crumbling down to nothing. It sent out a message that we were all born for a purpose, to make a difference to the society. It wasn't all about coming to school, bunking classes, and wallowing in merriment. The other side of it had always been left unexplored.

Twelfth-grade began, and suddenly, things weren't the same again. The merriment mellowed down, and people were infused with ambition. Some were still scarred from the incident, some even sardonic about the whole thing, but there was a very flimsy thread that held everyone together. Suddenly, that flimsy thread broke. Meaningful friendships turned into superficial hi-byes, people had fall-outs, there were ego-clashes, people were out to get each others backs. There was fierce competition among a few. They wanted to do well, even if it meant stepping on other peoples' toes. A couple of them slacked away, and indulged in various other activities that kept them happy. Hearts were broken. Friendships seemed to have acquired a very empty meaning to it. Superficiality continued to prevail. I was lost in a sea of people, who suddenly seemed to be very different. Or maybe, I was very different from the rest. I sought solace in studying and books, and decided to keep to myself. I didn't want to play the game that everyone else was playing. I had too much to lose and nearly nothing to gain. These new friendships that replaced the meaningful ones, had no foundation, and were built on sipping frappes in coffee pubs and discussing other people and spreading rumors. Suddenly, school didn't seem like the home it had once seemed like.
It was more of an obligation to go to school. I sat in the front bench and was glued to my seat almost always. I often skipped lunch, and when I was exceptionally hungry, I ate lunch hunching over the Accounts book. I loathed studying, but I had nothing else to do. I refused to let myself get drowned in the sea that everyone else was swimming in. I was happy being the loner I never was, keeping to myself and offering a smile and comforting words to anyone who needed it. I started counting the days for school to end. I had been happier before. The whole year carried a lot of bitter memories, and a ton of loneliness that I had made myself get accustomed to. Friends were only the people I did Accounts with and discussed school subjects with. I never really could bring myself to discuss movies, people of the opposite sex, music, food, and the like. Everything seemed so immaterial, so artificial. There was something more I had in mind, something special. Someone whom I could share my dreams and thoughts with. But that never happened, and at one point, I was too engulfed in solitude and had grown to enjoy the company of myself. And then suddenly, the exams came and went. School ended as soon as it had begun.
I felt a sense of loss as I took off my uniform for the last time, knowing that I would never wear it again. That was when it hit me that I had to attribute my whole being to my school. I entered ninth-grade as someone shy, scared and wanting to please people. But then school taught me that one cannot please everyone, and that one cannot rely on anyone else for support. One should establish their own standard of principles and abide by them, irrespective of what other people say. One needs to stand up for what they believe in and take things in their stride.
And I exited the school, thinking that I would next visit this place as an ex-student, but I'll always carry with me the memories of this school. It is, after all, the place where I grew to become the person I am.

nothingness

It took me four months of hardwork and a ton of loneliness tinged with desperation, to return to this place. I've been sucked into a vaccuum of nothingness at the moment, where I am left with just an unfamiliar hollow feeling that wrenches my gut, followed by the occassional jolt to reality. Then, i return into that empty shell and continue living a mechanical existence.
People rarely matter to me anymore. But surprisingly, what matters is not what you get, and what doesn't matter, is the only thing you're left with, the only thing you're forced to cling on to, much as you want to let go. And when you do, finally let go, you find yourself sinking into a bottomless abyss.
as i am sucked into nothingness, i let my mind meander into the tiny, forgotten specks of my life that lie buried under those memories that are worth cherishing. then, i try to put together the pieces of the puzzle, and yet, i am left with an incomplete picutre.

Just a thought...

Everytime I devour a galaxy bar, I keep thinking about the underpriviledged children who don't even get a bite to eat everyday. They're deprived of education and forced to work in tanneries.
In Ambur district, India, tens of thousands of children are presently working in tanneries. The output of that production goes into exports - mostly to Germany. Just like the adults, the children are unprotected against the aggressive chemical agents used in tanning the raw hides, the toxic vapors and the dust. The tanneries, where sometimes more than 150 different chemicals are used, are the worst. At times, working here can be fatal.
They toil hard to make leather shoes, which the rich people don with flamboyance.
India is not the only country that is plagued with poverty. Take Cambodia, for instance. Poverty in Cambodia is characterized by low income and consumption, poor nutritional status, low educational attainment, less access to public services including school and health services, less access to economic opportunities, vulnerability to external shocks, and exclusion from economic, social and political processes. The relatively high prevalence of HIV/Aids in Cambodia is an additional challenge to the current human development situation.
There are a plethora of NGOs and organizations striving towards eradicating poverty. Having adopted various approaches, ranging from equal distribution of income and wealth to providing employment opportunities, the poverty should have reduced by now, at least to a certain degree.
But it hasn't happened.
Could there be a flaw in the plan? Are the money, donations, and charity really reaching the poor people? Are they really being helped, and if so, to what extent? Are they being given employment opportunities? Are the children being educated in a condusive environment with good infrastructure? Are the ailing people being provided with proper medical treatment for free?
It's time for someone to ask file a Right to Information Act and ask the government to disclose information pertaining to the amount of funds the government recieves, and what percentage of it is being used effectively towards eradicationof poverty, and what does the government do with the remaining funds. The RTI Act is, I must say, one of the few benefits granted by the Constitution of India to the citizens. It'a an Act to provide for setting out the practical regime of right to information for citizens to secure access to information under the control of public authorities, in order to promote transparency and accountability in the working of every public authority, the constitution of a Central Information Commission and State Information Commissions and for matters connected therewith or incidental thereto.
It's time for the people to wake up, and raise their voices, otherwise the plight of our economy will continue to disintegrade.
We have to open our eyes to what's happening around us and really look.
Unless the condition improves, I don't think I'll ever be able to enjoy a bar of chocolate.